ATD: At The Doctor's

BFF: Best Friend Farted

BTW: Bring The Wheelchair

BYOT: Bring Your Own Teeth

CBM: Covered By Medicare

CGU: Can't Get Up

CUATSC: See You At The Senior Center

DWI: Driving While Incontinent

FWB: Friend With Beta Blockers

FWIW: Forgot Where I Was

FYI: Found Your Insulin - or - For Your Indigestion

GGPBL: Gotta Go, Pacemaker Battery Low

GHA: Got Heartburn Again

GLKI: Gotta Go, Laxative Kicked In

GTG: Get the Geritol

HGBM: Had Good Bowel Movement

IMHO: Is My Hearing-Aid On?

JK: Just Kvetching

LMDO: Laughing My Dentures Out

LOL: Living On Lipitor

LWO: Lawrence Welk's On

MGAD: My Grandson's a Doctor

OHK: Oxygen Hose Kinked

OMG: Oy, My Grandchildren

OMMR: On My Massage Recliner

OMSG: Oh My! Sorry, Gas

PIMP: Pooped in my Pants

ROFL... CGU: Rolling On The Floor Laughing ... And Can't Get Up

SGGP: Sorry, Gotta Go Poop

SUP: Speak Up, Please

TGIF: Thank Goodness it's Four (Four o'clock - Early Bird Specials)

TTYL: Talk To You Louder

WAITT: Who Am I Talking To?

WIWYA: When I Was Your Age ...

WTFA: Wet The Furniture Again

WTP: Where's The Prunes?

WWNO: Walker Wheels Need Oil